Monday, October 29, 2018

The Gall Centre

Pic: Retail Hell Underground

If I could live forever, I still doubt if the cellphone company's admin issue with me would ever be resolved.

Their Call Centre is a Kafkaesque trial in a leaking submarine, trapped in a dank cave with a rising tide.

"Just pay" she says.

" For what?" I ask.

" I can't tell you that - it's pre legal"

" It's paranormal!" I respond.

" I'm sorry sir?"

Scratching for air and light, I query if I'm possibly part of a Monty Python sketch.

"I'm sorry sir, once it's pre legal, the system won't allow me in to tell you what it's for."

"So A.I. now replicates floundering human incompetence in a symbiotic, upended purgatorial slinky spiral, whirring through Westron echoes down into Middle Earths bowels to eternal damnation and suffering!" I offer, starting to express myself clearer.

" Fraid so sir...unless you pay the outstanding amount."

" For WHAT!!!"

" I told you once..." she reminds me.


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